For my first article here on FitnessVolt.com, I want to talk about something I’ve been seeing a lot lately. I read a lot of blogs and am very interested in other people’s pursuit of health and fitness, but unfortunately one common thing I keep seeing is people who are trying to make positive changes are being brought down by others. Not only just acquaintances, but often by their loved ones and the people who should be supporting them the most. So why does this happen?
Well it’s all only speculation, but I have a theory. I think people who don’t feel good about themselves are threatened by others making changes. They don’t like it when other people have more willpower than they do themselves, and can do the things that they struggle to do.
I don’t think most even realize it, but when they make these negative comments it can really throw people off of their game. Sometimes I even think they are trying to be nice, but are actually doing more harm than good. Comments like “Don’t lose any more weight, you are getting too skinny” when the person they are directing the comment at is still 50 pounds overweight. It’s a backhanded compliment, just like “Are you allowed to eat that?”, or “Come on you can have one doughnut, it won’t hurt!” Now, why would anyone want someone who is trying to be healthy to eat a doughnut or other unhealthy foods when they don’t want to? Is it jealousy?
It’s kind of like that person at your office who tries to get someone who is trying to quit smoking to go out for a smoke with them. Seriously? Why in the world would you try to get someone to smoke if they are trying to quit? It has to be to “feel better about themselves.” The thought process must be, “If I can get you to smoke with me I’ll feel better about myself when I smoke”. The same line of thought then would be, “If I can get you to eat that doughnut I’ll feel better about myself when I eat one”.
One thing I do know is you don’t hear these kinds of comments from people who make health and fitness a priority. Those of us who do can appreciate what others are going through. We tell them good job for making smart decisions instead of questioning why they don’t choose the alternative. We help steer them in the right direction and would never dream of pushing them towards anything unhealthy.
So if you are someone who is struggling with your weight and you hear these comments from others, just brush them off and be happy knowing that those who say these things only wish they could do as good of a job as you. Be proud that you are doing well enough that people are threatened by you. Start gravitating to the people who support you and take the rest with a grain of salt. Use the hating as a way to motivate you to push harder instead of letting it get you down. If those who make these comments understood and cared about health and fitness, they wouldn’t say these things. If you are someone who makes these comments to others, please understand what you are doing and give it a rest. People undertaking life changes need all the support they can get.